Lately I’ve been in one of those fogs… where you are more keenly aware of your mind and way more “inside yourself” than anything else. And one thing that I keep coming back to – well, I figured I might as well share it with you guys. That’s what blogs are for, right?
You know how growing up… for most people there’s a moment where we see someone (most likely a parent) doing something that they just do not love? They seem so miserable or robot-like. Like a zombie just going through the motions, day in and day out, because they have to. And we swear to ourselves that we won’t be like that. We won’t let ourselves just become a statistic… another drone that just drudges through life.
And then one day, we wake up and we’re exactly that.
How did we get there?
The bigger question I’ve been asking myself lately is… how do we change that?
There must be a way, right? People all over the place are doing what they love. So there’s got to be a way to make that happen.
But how do you bridge the gap? How do you get to the point where you aren’t just mindlessly pushing through each day, constantly counting down to the next weekend and you are actually enjoying what you do? Most people spend well over 2000 hours a year at their job, and what a waste that is when it’s a job that we don’t love.
We heard people tell us all the time that we could do anything we put our minds to. That we could be anything we wanted to be. So how many people actually took that to heart and really made it happen?
What about you guys – do you like what you do?
To be clear, I am SUPER grateful for the job that I have and for all that it has afforded me. I believe that the work I do makes a difference and that is something that’s really important to me. Maybe this is less about my actual job, currently, and more about the stage of life that I’m in. I don’t know… But I do want to be clear that I’m not ungrateful.
I just sometimes look back and think about how I got to where I am and wonder how the slightest change in direction could’ve landed me in a completely different place. This isn’t really the focus of this post, though, so I’ll get back to that before I veer too far off course…
I’m just not someone who sees myself sitting at a desk. I’ve been doing this kind of work for 12 years, now, and I just don’t know if it’s right for me. I want to work with my hands. I want to be outside more. I want… just something different.
Do you now anyone who’s made a complete career change at some point in their lives? How did they do this?
Doing something like this would take a lot of faith and right now it just seems like nothing more than a fantasy.
I don’t mean to sound depressing or completely unhappy because I’m not. I have a good life. I’m a happy person and I’m not sure if I do a good job of conveying that through this blog, but it’s true. I’m just not one to go more than an hour without having a smile on my face. It’s just not who I am.
But even in the midst of that, I can’t help but wonder, sometimes, if this is really what I should be doing… if it’s where I should be. This isn’t something that I just started feeling recently, but I’ve discussed it with Studly on quite a few occasions over the years. And it just all comes back to one major point: how would I even begin to make such a drastic career change?
Anywho – this is really just my trying to sort through some thoughts “out loud” so I’d love to hear from you. Anything to add? Is anyone else dealing with similar feelings? Have any of you or someone you know gone through this and just taken a giant leap of faith? I’d love to hear about it!
Oh hello there, future… When did you get here?!
How has it been so long since I last posted? Ah yes. Life happened.
So a lots been going on, lately, and I haven’t taken the time to post. Sorry, buds! I had my girls weekend a little while back, and then had to drive into the next state over for a baby shower the next weekend. I got one weekend to clean the house and catch-up on laundry before it was time for Easter, which involves a big get-together with my family, and that was immediately followed by having to show the house multiple times (meaning cleaning, cleaning, and more cleaning). It’s exhausting, and it’s not even our house! That part comes later…
So here I am… Trying to sort through all of the things that have been going on, lately, to fill you in and I realize that I’m waaayyyyy behind! I’ll do my best, but let’s be honest – it’d be near impossible to fill you in, now, without leaving anything out. I’ll work backwards, because that’s how my brain seemed to want to work today.
So begins the brain dump:
– I’m currently recovering from one of my favorite meals: steak, cheese potatoes, and asparagus. I loooove it, but I don’t think I’ll ever get used to the way that asparagus makes your pee stink for days. Blech!
– I’ve been spending most of my free time over the past week or so writing and trying to finish a song for a friend. She’s recording this Friday, so now I’m in a mega time-crunch, which is not easy for this perfectionist! I’m really loving this, and it’s definitely stretching me. It’s a different style and totally different genre than I’m used to writing, so I’m really hoping it doesn’t turn out lame or cheesy. *fingers crossed
– I still can’t seem to get the coordinator for our move to Texas to contact me. I’ve called, emailed, called again….. Nothing! No big deal, right? It’s just our life. 😐
– I got my newest Stitch Fix, today. I actually need to do an entire review on the forks you guys. I’ve had 3 “Fixes” now and can’t wait to share my thoughts and see if any of you have used it or considered it at all.
– Mothers Day is less than two weeks away. It’s traditionally a less-than-stellar time for many who struggle with infertility and I am no exception. To top it all off my baby sister is pregnant with the first baby of the family, so…. That should make of some interesting moments, for sure. I’ve kind’ve been feeling this fog trying to come down over me, lately, but I’ve been doing my best to keep myself upbeat, stay positive, and stay away from known “triggers”… Just trying to be smart, I guess. I’ve been doing well and still do feel like I’m in a good place, but that doesn’t mean that I won’t ever have a tough day or two. So I’m trying not to beat myself up if I feel it coming, but still want to try to remember that I can’t control the situation and that I’ll become a mom when the timing is absolutely perfect. Not before… Not after… But right on time.
– I started a book a few weeks back and it didn’t pull me in right away. I picked it up again this past weekend and was really into it up until the book took a weird turn. Now I’m trying not to just put it down and move on because it could get better again, right? But still…. I hate it when that happens.
– I’ve been thinking about starting a series of posts about things I plan/hope to teach my children. If nothing else, it’d be awesome to be able to look back on them sometime, right? To gauge my success or compare what I thought to what I’d make a priority when the time actually comes. What do you think?
Anywho, I know that I’ve left things out! but this’ll have to do for now. I’ll update when I remember more and won’t wait so long to post again. There just WAY too much going on to let that happen.
In fact, I think I may start calling this the year of Hope! 😛